Heeb Magazine: Battle of the Schwartzes
Lookyloo, I'm battling for Schwartz domination.
The new edition of Heeb magazine is out, and whomp, there I am -- pitted against Elaine Schwartz. Vote for me! Vote for me! I have a boa! Vote for me! I must trounce that schoolteacher's ass.
Just think -- this time, you can vote and maybe not feel like all-is-lost when the results come in. A vote for Bex is a vote for the blue states! Although I'm sure the other Schwartz is also blue. Jews tend to go blue.
I'm a Jew with the Flu who votes Blue!
Speaking of... I am still sickypoo and it sucks. Even watching tivo'ed episodes of CSI: Miami isn't making me feel better, and if Horatio can't penetrate my ickyness, then all is lost.
My friend Adam tells me that they now make Theraflu in dissolve-able strip form -- like those Listerine strips, but for the flu instead of fresh-breath. I can't wait til they make tequila strips -- all the buzz, none of the fuzz, yo.