Tuesday, January 29, 2008
I'm just saying -- pretty sneaky, Fox, saving up the holiday House episode til you knew we were so starved for entertainment we would even consider watching "The Connor Chronicles" -- although, we saw through that scheme because PEE-YEW, it stinks, even starring River/Summer (she has a real nature name and a fake nature name!) from "Firefly" (which I watched in repeats on Universal HD; full disclosure: I am a Whedon latecomer and I've never even seen Buffy). And Lost doesn't even come back til Thursday! So you got us with your hoarded Christmas episode!
And I bet your ratings will kick ass.
Merry Belated Christmas, Fox. You got us good this time.
Monday, January 28, 2008
See? His right ear (on the left side of the photo) is like a regular, little ear. But his left ear (on the right side of the photo) is a huge, Dopey-of-the-Seven-Dwarves, distended, old-man ear!
How does that happen? I know that men's earlobes stretch as they get old, creating that old man ear effect, but how does it only happen on one side of the body? Does Mickey Rooney have magic ears. It must be.
MICKEY ROONEY HAS MAGIC EARS! (Kind of like how Lt. Dan has magic legs.)
Friday, January 25, 2008
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
I'm rocking a show called "SLIGHTLY BUZZED" tomorrow night. It's at 8pm at Rififi. I'm slightly excited because apparently I get a theme song that I didn't have to write. I am also not sure what exactly I will be doing but it will probably be
A) about pop culture
B) pretty stupid
C) relatively funny
D) something you’d enjoy more if you were slightly buzzed.
That is not a multiple choice question, it is a pipe. This is not a pipe. (insert photo of pipe: here).
Details: "Slightly Buzzed is a variety show that invites its performers to do WHATEVER they want. Something new, something old, something out of their comfort zone, something experimental, something in their comfort zone, eat a sandwich ..."
Hosted by Jon Friedman (he produces the amazing "REJECTION SHOW") and Stuckey & Murray (they did that video about humping a unicorn that you liked so much)
Matt Goldich - (funny comic)
Roger Hailes - (also a very funny comic)
Elna Baker - (also a very, very funny comic)
Bex Schwartz - (I talk crap about famous people on television, occasionally. And in bars, most of the time)
332 E. 11th Street (between 1st and 2nd)
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
JOSH: a lot of people seem to think i should know this.
BEX: because you don't work in a place where the entire building starts shouting "OMG HEATH LEDGER IS DEAD, WHAT DO WE TELL JAKE GYLLENHAAL." Because that is what is happening in my office.
JOSH: sounds fu
BEX: it truly is.
JOSH: which is 66% of fun
BEX: that is exactly correct, algorithmically speaking.
JOSH: like an ice cream sundae with no toppings.
BEX: shouting "HEATH LEDGER IS DEAD" is actually scientifically proven to be 66% fun. now, if we were shouting "HEATH LEDGER IS DEAD, COVERED IN SPRINKLES ..."
JOSH: 100% fun!
BEX: The remaining 44%. Or, wait. 34%. i'm sorry, heath ledger is dead, i can no longer do math.
JOSH: i wonder what it would take to spread the meme that he was covered in hot fudge and sprinkles at the time of his death
BEX: considering that EVERYONE IS GOOGLING Heath Ledger ... i could just post it right now.
JOSH: i'll buy you a snapple if one major media outlet picks it up
Despite the horribly insensitive nature of this post, I do actually have a heart and that heart feels very sad for Heath's friends and family and loved ones. And, aren't they still doing reshoots on that Batman movie? Dang.
And also, don't these things happen in threes? Brad Renfro ... Heath Ledger ... I'm just saying, if you're an attractive young leading man, perhaps now is not the time to take flying lessons, if you're picking up what I'm putting down.
Come on, Major Media Outlets! Momma wants a Snapple!
Monday, January 21, 2008
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Saturday, January 12, 2008
I am shooting a music video for my buddypal Mike Doughty next Sunday, January 20th.
We're shooting in Brooklyn. It's a daytime exterior shoot and we'll basically need you to hang out in a grand choir of people lip-syncing the chorus to one of Mike's new songs from his soon-to-be-released album. So we'll need you from the morningtime until it gets dark. It's the day before MLK day, so you probably don't even have to work on Monday. We're doing this guerilla-low-budget style, so, we can't pay you, but you do get to
a) be in an awesome music video with anti-war themes
b) hang out with me and mike all day long
c) tell all your friends that you're in a music video.
We're looking for all shapes, sizes, vibes, demographics and SAT scores.
Please also be pleasant to work with and not completely insane.
Interested? Gmail me a photo and a note why you're intrigued to starbex AT gmail DOT com.
Also: anyone want to crew up? I'm looking to fill a few crew spots as well.