After Spaceballs came out, my mom made “May the Schwartz Be With You” t-shirts for my entire family. We all wore them together whenever we went out and about — to the 4th of july parade, to family gatherings, and apparently we brought them to Florida and wore them to Busch Gardens together.
Monday, January 06, 2014
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Jews 'n' Food 'n' Moms 'n' The Middlesteins
Posted by bex schwartz at 12:32 PM 137 comments:
Monday, August 27, 2012
Bex and Peter and also The Wolf
Just what you always wanted to watch! This is me narrating Peter and the Wolf with the Atlantic Pops. Enjoy!
Posted by bex schwartz at 2:50 PM 28 comments:
Friday, August 10, 2012
The first Do Something Awards host promo started airing on the teevee last night! Written/directed by me.
The guys from "The New Girl" (Jake Johnson, Lamorne Morris and Max Greenfield) are getting ready to host the Do Something! Awards by making a difference - but it's not a competition, right? [NO GOLDFISH were harmed in the making of this promo!]
Watch the guys host the show Tuesday, August 21, 2012 at 9/8c on VH1 with performances by Flo Rida and .fun!
Vote now for your favorite celebrities: http://www.DoSomething.vh1.com
Follow @VH1 and @dosomething on Twitter and use hashtag #DSAwards
Learn more about DoSomething.org: http://www.dosomething.org
Posted by bex schwartz at 12:53 PM 17 comments:
I'm lapping it up!
I made you this gif! For when you need Apolo Ohno to describe his oral sex technique. In handy-dandy gif form.
Posted by bex schwartz at 12:52 PM 37 comments:
Wednesday, August 08, 2012
CELINE DION FOREVERS!
Hello! Here I am, repping for Celine Dion in VH1’s Greatest Artists of the 90s brackets! A vote for Celine Dion is sort of a vote for me, but mostly for Celine Dion! VOTE! DO IT.
Posted by bex schwartz at 10:47 AM 4 comments:
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
5 Questions With Meeee
I answered 5 questions for GLOC* if you are really bored!
*Gorgeous Ladies of Comedy
*Gorgeous Ladies of Comedy
Posted by bex schwartz at 1:50 PM 2 comments:
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Monday, April 23, 2012
Single Ladies season 2!
Posted by bex schwartz at 11:38 AM 5 comments:
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
The Bear-Schwartz household makes a doctor's appointment
Me: Hi, I'd like to make an appointment for Panda Boo Bear's yearly check up.
Vet's Office: Panda Boo Bear ... let's see ... is your last name Bear?
Me: No, my cat's last name is Bear. My last name is Schwartz.
Vet's Office: Oh, there he is! Panda Boo Bear Schwartz.
Me: No, when I adopted him I didn't make him take my last name.
Vet's Office: Well, that's how we list them. So, just so you know, he's in our records as Panda Boo Bear Schwartz.
Me: I feel like we should hyphenate that?
Vet's Office: I'm sorry?
Me: Can we hyphenate that? Like he's Panda Boo Bear-Schwartz?
Vet's Office: ... if you'd prefer.
Me: Yes, thank you.
Posted by bex schwartz at 11:49 AM 20 comments:
Friday, March 09, 2012
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
Lady Gaga won! I won! We all won!
I won! Or rather, Lady Gaga won the Greatest Woman in Pop!
This is me with a 102 degree fever and very severe sinus infection and you can pretty much tell. But hooray for ladies with funny voices and funny noises! REPPIN' HARD!
Posted by bex schwartz at 2:47 PM 4 comments:
Saturday, February 25, 2012
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