Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Vaguely Liveblogging Katie Couric on the CBS Evening News

Oh, Katie. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUR FACE? Suddenly, you're robo-Katie. Like the Chenbot, but vis-a-vis appearance versus visage. Why doesn't your face move? Did you have an upper eye lift? Why do your eyes look so very scary?

And white? AFTER LABOR DAY? Oh, Katie, no! And, please, when I think "Hard News" I think neither of a white blazer nor of 4-inch heels. I think a somber blazer and perhaps some flats.

Plus, your Titanic-inspired theme song makes me want to do a jig (with the poor people in steerage, where all the fun is) rather than listen to news.

Also, I can't believe -- I simply, simply CANNOT BELIEVE -- that you just said, "As many of you remember, next Monday marks the 5 year anniversary of September 11th."

As MANY of you remember? Who doesn't remember? My two-year-old second cousin? Then why is he watching Katie Couric?

Surely, he is also offended by the white-after-Labor-Day thing. Way to go, Couric. Way to go.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

on her first cbs nightly newscast, did katie forget this isnt the today show. I expect 30 minutes of SERIOUS of national and domestic news. WHAT? I have to hear about Tom Cruises baby pictures. oh my god. click click WELCOME NBC NEWS

Aaron said...

We gave it a C, maybe a C+. The white blazer and gratuitous leg shot at the end kept it solidly out of B range.

What's a shame is that Schieffer transformed the newscast into a showpiece for great reporters -- suddenly that's gone, replaced by a showpiece for Katie.

OK, Katie, so you don't have a clever tagline like Ed Murrow or Ron Burgundy. That's fine. But don't ask me to come up with one for you! This isn't improv comedy! Consider doing a smidge of your own writing, and come up with one on your own.