Monday, August 22, 2005

The Sounds of Awesomeness

Holy hot fuck! It's McGruff the Crime Dog's classic album, Keeping Kids Safe!

I HIGHLY suggest you listen to track two, "I'm Glad I'm Me!"

Another juicy nugget: "It's Not Your Fault," the absolving-of-self-guilt anti-molestation rap. RAP. rap.

I used to loooove McGruff the crime dog. Once, we went to the very awesome and exotic tourist destination known as Port Authority Bus Terminal (or, the PABT, if you're nasty), because my mom's college buddy Sue was the President or the Chairwoman or the Head of Something or other, and we got the behind the scenes tour, which included legless beggars in wheelchairs and heroin-addicts in the lock-up AND Sue bought me a GIANT CANDYCANE (that eventually lasted until August)!!! And there were posters on the walls of the jail area featuring McGruff the crime dog, and I sang the song that I knew so well from the commercials:

Users are losers
And losers are users
So don't use drugs, don't use drugs!
If you know a user even part of time,
Tell them to quit!
Take a bite out of crime!

To this day, I'm not sure if McGruff was singing about part-time users, or users whom you may have only known part of the time. Like, is it,
1)."Oh, Schlomo, he uses drugs on Tuesdays and Thursdsays ... he uses drugs only part of the time."
Or, is it:
2). "Oh, that's Larry, he's the intern who's here on Tuesdays and Thursdays ... I'd say I know him only part of the time."

And this nugget of joy is also audio awesomeness. It's Prexy George Bush the 2nd singing (kinda) "Imagine" by John Lennon.

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