There's an autumnal chill to the air which means I've been roasting cauliflower and thinking about how badly I want to go back-to-school shopping. Which made me think of one of my favorite all-time commercials, EVER:
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Friday, August 10, 2007
Watch me on TV Tonight!
Yo yo yo -- set your time-shifting television-recording device now! "The 40 Greatest Reality Show Moments 2" premieres tonight on VH1 at 8pm! Two hours of awesome! And it will probably repeat for many, many times! Because it's VH1!
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Weeping Amber, the Anti Semite
So, I'm watching my first ever season of Big Brother, and I find it captivating. I'm also distraught at all the god-people on the show, although I like how the editors are quickly showing us how all the god-people are not high-and-mighty and good-living and nice, but are actually as douchetastic as the people-not-of-faith.
F'rinstance. Here's god-person Amber talking to god-person Jameka (incidentally, Jameka is the one who thinks the whole game is pre-deterined by god, and she also thinks that "god is gangsta." word). The audio is a wee murky at the top, but keep on watching and you'll soon discover that Amber is a nasty anti-semite, who probably feels DISNASTY after hugging Dustin all season, only to learn that Dustin is a (shock!) Jew. A gay Jew, at that!
I like how god-person Jameka starts slowly sidling away from Amber on the couch there as Amber gets more and more anti-semtically horrible. And also, Amber? You're on tv. And the internet. Good luck keeping that job as a Cocktail Waitress in Vegas, because we all know Vegas is run by the Jews.
Amber's comments:
"The majority of people I know from New York are Jewish, and the majority of Jewish people I know, my gosh, so many are so selfish. So weird. Even my sister always tells me, she's like my sister, and my mom will meet someone and I'll be like, 'I don't like that person. That person doesn't seem like a very good person to me,' and my mom and sister are like, 'You know why?' Why? 'They're Jewish.' How do you know? 'Amber you can tell by their last name, you can tell by their nose.' I'm like, 'Really?'"
F'rinstance. Here's god-person Amber talking to god-person Jameka (incidentally, Jameka is the one who thinks the whole game is pre-deterined by god, and she also thinks that "god is gangsta." word). The audio is a wee murky at the top, but keep on watching and you'll soon discover that Amber is a nasty anti-semite, who probably feels DISNASTY after hugging Dustin all season, only to learn that Dustin is a (shock!) Jew. A gay Jew, at that!
I like how god-person Jameka starts slowly sidling away from Amber on the couch there as Amber gets more and more anti-semtically horrible. And also, Amber? You're on tv. And the internet. Good luck keeping that job as a Cocktail Waitress in Vegas, because we all know Vegas is run by the Jews.
Amber's comments:
"The majority of people I know from New York are Jewish, and the majority of Jewish people I know, my gosh, so many are so selfish. So weird. Even my sister always tells me, she's like my sister, and my mom will meet someone and I'll be like, 'I don't like that person. That person doesn't seem like a very good person to me,' and my mom and sister are like, 'You know why?' Why? 'They're Jewish.' How do you know? 'Amber you can tell by their last name, you can tell by their nose.' I'm like, 'Really?'"
FUCK ME WITH A HANDSAW
Geez louise! My typically 15-minute commute to work took me an hour and fifteen minutes. But at least I made it in. I'm cutting (yet another) Baio spot today and this place is a GHOST TOWN. Like, tumbleweeds style. For those of you who aren't in the NYC vicinity, there was some super duper evil weather and the subways aren't running and the buses are so crammed they're not even stopping. The mayor is actually telling people to stay home because there's no way that mass transit can get you where you need to go.
So I spent an eternity crammed like a sardine into a subway car with no a/c. I felt like a poor moo-cow on its way to slaughter. As did everyone else on train, which kept stopping for 20 minutes in between stations, which of course freaks me out because every time my subway stops between stations, my brain instantly assumes that there's another terrorist attack going or perhaps aliens have destroyed the city (it happens). But, no such thing -- just an aging infrastructure that can't support the sheer volume of commuters. Oh, the humanity.
So I spent an eternity crammed like a sardine into a subway car with no a/c. I felt like a poor moo-cow on its way to slaughter. As did everyone else on train, which kept stopping for 20 minutes in between stations, which of course freaks me out because every time my subway stops between stations, my brain instantly assumes that there's another terrorist attack going or perhaps aliens have destroyed the city (it happens). But, no such thing -- just an aging infrastructure that can't support the sheer volume of commuters. Oh, the humanity.
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